AND still in survival mode....

© photo by Judi Getch Brodman

Will life ever return to normal I ask myself every day.  I now understand how much we have taken for granted - the hugs from family and friends, visits with grandparents and the older generation, meeting friends for coffee and a chat, eating out, the kid's sports, even work... I miss all that and more.   

My professional life has sometimes taken me on very solitary journeys - I built software and computer systems and then went on to manage a very large department, but even then, I couldn't socialize with my workers.  And being a writer?  Talk about a solitary profession.  Saving grace is that I have my characters to talk with :-) 

I read an editorial today in a writing magazine which expressed beautifully how the editor felt...  that her emotional swings were "seismic" over things like no toilet paper in the store or photos of people flaunting being out and about disregarding medical advice.   I know how she feels... going out for groceries is a big deal now - I take my mask and gloves, my list and enter the closed foreign environment.  I clean the carriage handle and begin my adventure following the arrows, making sure to stop or turn if someone passes, hating the feel of the mask over my face and mouth fogging up my glasses, knowing I have to do this now.  I make my shopping venture quick, precise, and once every two weeks if I can.  I've taken to rationing how much news I watch, the stories of loved ones dying without the touch of a family member's hand; a new baby entering the world without Dad there to hold him/her moments after they begin their journey through life; Dad not being able to hug his wife and tell her how beautifully she did during the birth and how much he loves her; grandparents and soldiers being taken from us just because they are living in a place that their family thought was safe for them - the agony on the faces and in the voices of those family members; the protests that we all hope will bring real change not just die away... I agree that all of these stories are important and need to be told, but some days, I'm overwhelmed by the shear volume of them all.   And then, family and friends are going through their own tough days on top of all this and all I can do is support them long distance.

But in spite of all that I have said, I take solace in walks, in gardening, and of course in my writing and painting.  It gives me joy to think that maybe when someone reads one of my books, it will take them away for a few hours from the pressures and sorrows of today's world. My paintings seem to reflect the solitude that we all feel...

© painting by Judi Getch Brodman "Freedom"

But we know that these days will pass; eventually we'll laugh and love again... it's only a matter of time, but until then, stay safe, stay well, and keep writing.  

Till,
Judi